Peaches are the Sweetest
by Blood Brandy
Summary: Peach is always getting kidnapped, is there maybe a reason for that? Meet the true King of the Koopas. Original Idea by Nirvash5. Rated M for a reason. Naruto/Harem
1. Prologue

**A.N. Before anyone says anything, this is an expansion on Nirvash5's snippet "Peaches are the Sweetest", I use his/her work with his/her permission, the idea originated from them but I feel I have added more than a fair amount.**

**None of My other works are dead, I've just been tied up. The only reason I did this is because it's one of those Ideas that wouldn't leave me alone.**

**Enjoy.**

**-0-0-0-0-**

_**Prologue**_

Princess peach sighed as she looked out of the castle window. It was getting increasingly harder to see her one true love. Between their respective responsibilities it was increasingly harder to keep Mario as a friend without getting involved, especially when he seemed hell bent on making her his wife for some odd reason. Her melancholy mood was broken when a small bird landed next to her.  
The first thing she noticed was the small scroll strapped to the creature's leg. Excitedly she untied the scroll from the bird. She opened and recognized the symbols before she immediately threw it into the room. A second later a poof erupted from where the scroll had landed.

When the smoke cleared Bowser, king of the Koopas, was kneeling in front of her. "Peach-sama, my master has sent me with a message." Peach smiled in anticipation and motioned for him to continue. "He has arranged a way for you to meet. I am to take you to the spot and guard you until he arrives."  
Peach immediately ran and grabbed a bag she always kept filled with her essentials and handed it to the Koopa. "The usual way please, Bowser-kun." Bowser nodded before picking her up gently before roaring loudly and kicked down the door, startling poor toad. He ran as the princess acted scared and frightened.

-0-0-0-0-

About four hours of travel, they arrived at the castle where she would be locked up 'against her will'. She was quickly led to the master bedroom of the palace where Bowser knocked on the door "Master, Peach-sama has arrived as requested." There was a barely audible reply before Bowser bowed again and opened the door. He watched as the princess walked through the door swiftly.

He closed the door and swiftly departed to set up the levels of traps and delays so that his Master and Mistress would not be disturbed for some time. Just as he started down the stairs he heard a loud scream. Master must have been really horny to make her scream that loudly so quickly.

-0-0-0-0-

**BB: The randy parts of this story has been removed or altered due to current site crackdown, and will be reposted if circumstances allow later on.**

-0-0-0-0-

Mario rolled to the left, just dodging a bolt of energy from the Magikoopa in front of him. Internally he cursed whatever glitch in the castle security had gotten Peach taken this time, and a little at the woman herself. Seriously, he knew she could hit pretty hard and was certain she had at least a frying pan hidden somewhere on her person at all times for that. He could understand the first few times, but now it was almost like she _wanted_ to be kidnapped.

_No, _Mario thought as he knocked out the enemy, _why would she want to hang around a bunch of monster turtles when she could have a suave Italian hunk like me?_

-0-0-0-0-

Peach moaned as she ran her fingers over the blond hair of her lover, her clothes discarded or torn with the exception of her stockings, garter and trademark crown. She looked to her lover, red-faced and panting, "Please, Naruto-kun, don't make me beg."

Naruto growled back, and set to testing the resilience of their bed.

-0-0-0-0-

Mario ducked behind a wall, narrowly avoiding a flying hammer whizzing by. He knew he would need to have good timing to get past the brothers.

On the other side of the wall, however, one Ham and Mer were getting earfuls over their headsets from Kammy.

"_Watch out, you brats!" _The old Magikoopa yelled, _"Mistress wants him delayed, not dead, and if you do something to sadden Mistress, the Master will have your shells for soup bowls!"_

Ham sighed, "It wouldn't have killed him, just knocked him out," he said, low enough that the enemy wouldn't hear.

"Don't try and argue, Bro," Mer said, "You can't win with her, and she's right," he shuddered a bit, "I really don't want to piss off the big kahuna."

The brothers went back to trying to bean the red hated plumber. Even if they had to take a dive, it didn't mean they couldn't have some fun first.

-0-0-0-0-

The blond couple lay, kissing passionately with the princess on top, their bodies held close in the lull of their love making. She leaned in, licking along a whisker mark and getting the soft purr-like groan she always loved to hear from him

-0-0-0-0-

Mario finished off the last Goomba in the group, stopping for a breather. Again he cursed Bowser, and wished Peach was better able to defend herself against him like she had those weird brothers a while back.

The first had been some tall, lanky guy named Waluigi had kidnapped Peach, and had managed to keep her for all of two hours before he was chased, bruised and bloody, back into the castle by a putter wielding Peach, screaming to get the crazy bitch away from him.

When asked what happened, she said he had tried to feel her up.

Not long after he was locked up, his stronger brother, Wario, had managed to kidnap her as well, and held her for ransom, demanding both gold and his brother's freedom. By the time Mario had found them, though, he wasn't needed. Peach said she had been asleep in another room when what ever happened had happened. Whatever it was, Wario was found almost to the point of wetting himself and shaking in fear, he wouldn't say what happened, and openly agreed to any sentence the court would give him.

-0-0-0-0-

Peach shuddered as Naruto gently toyed with her body, and could feel him 'knocking at the back door' as it were. She wormed away in faux fear, "Naruto-kun," she purred.

Seeing her game, Naruto couldn't find the patience to play along and leapt into action.

-0-0-0-0-

Mario stood, carefully staying out of reach of the chain chomps at the door of the castle where the princess was held. For a moment he thought he heard a familiar scream. He quickly leaped over the metal monsters and into the castle.

-0-0-0-0-

Bowser heard the steps of the plumber moving away and opened his eyes, rising from his faked unconsciousness and sighed, he had strong bones like any Koopa, some would even say the strongest short of the true king, but having that red hat wearing asshole repeatedly jump on his head got annoying really quick.

"He could at least learn a new trick," Bowser grumbled to himself, "Seriously, a sword, a club, a martial art, anything!"

"Papa!" Bowser saw his youngest son running up to him, "Does this mean auntie Peach is gonna leave now?" the little one asked, a sad look on his face.

"You know the drill, son." Bowser sighed.

"Awww," Junior whined, "But she didn't even get to play with me or see my new painting or anything, Master keeps hogging her."

Bowser shook his head, no matter how smart he was, it was easy to see Junior was a kid at times like this, "Son, you know Peach-sama loves you, but she _is_ the masters mate," he ruffled the small tuft of his son's hair, "you'll understand someday when you meet that special girl yourself."

"I know, papa," Junior said, looking at the ground, "I just wish we didn't have to go through all this stuff for her to visit."

"I know, son, and hopefully someday soon she will be able to stay, but for now, at least, we have to do this for Naruto-sama." Seeing his son's still downtrodden expression, he put a claw on his shoulder, "C'mon, son, I think your Auntie Birdo made your favorite for dinner."

Junior looked up and smiled, "Alright, papa," he giggled as his father hefted him onto his shoulder and walked off. As they approached the hidden passageway to their home, Junior asked the question that had bothered him for a while, "Papa, why do we call him 'Auntie Birdo'?"

Bowser sighed again as he opened the door, "Because he wants us to, son, and if that spell your granny Kammy found works, he will be a she come the next full moon, so it's probably best to just get used to it."

Just as the door closed behind them, a shell shocked looking Mario wandered back into the room, alone, and headed towards the exit.

-0-0-0-0-

-Minutes Before-

Time was of the essence. Mario had just defeated Bowser and was now rushing up the stairs to where he knew princess peach to be. He stopped at the end of the hall and took a breather. One day maybe he would actually get something besides a small kiss on the face for doing all this to save her from the clutches of the evil king of the Koopa. He stopped at the door way and placed a hand on the door knob. Something was telling him to let go turn around and walk away but he ignored and threw open the door.

He was about to proclaim something about saving Princess Peach but froze. On the bed in the middle of the room, Peach was their but she was naked and engaged in having sexual intercourse with a blond whisker faced man. Neither noticed him as both were too caught up in their own activities.

Mario slowly backed out of the room and shut the door. He was going to have to get super drunk so he could forget what he just saw.

-0-0-0-0-

A few hours later, the blond pair was lounging in their post-coital afterglow; Peach enjoying the pleasant soreness she felt as she traced the strange black spiral tattoo on her lover's toned stomach and Naruto gently stroking the princess's blonde locks before reaching and lightly tickling the bite mark on her shoulder.

Peach cooed at the pleasurable jolt, despite how long ago he had given her that mark it was still so sensitive when it came to Naruto.

"So, how have things been in the Mushroom Kingdom, Beautiful?" Naruto asked.

Peach sighed, "The same old stuff, it just gets so boring. I mean, I'm glad we aren't at war and everything, but it just gets so hard having to be away from you, Naruto-kun. Daisy said it's the same for her." She blushed a bit before she continued, "We can help each other when she comes to visit, and I know Pauline is working hard so she can stay distracted, it's not enough. We all miss you, my love."

Naruto nodded, "I know, Peach-koi. Things are always real busy among the Koopas, but it hurts to be away from my mates, _all_ of my mates."

Peach nodded in understanding, "How are your…plans coming along?"

Naruto sighed, "I can stay in contact with them longer now, but even with the magic powers of Bowser, Kammy and Kamek and my own powers, we still have a little while to go."

The princess snuggled into his shoulder, "I know you can do it, Naruto-kun, and I can't wait to meet them."

Naruto smiled and pulled the young woman into a kiss, breaking it when his stomach rumbled, "Maybe we should wash up and go eat, I know I won't hear the end of it from Kammy-baa-chan if Junior doesn't get a chance to show you his new painting.

Peach nodded, and climbed out of bed, swaying her hips as she headed towards the bathroom. Naruto growled and headed after her.

After one more round, the pair washed up and headed to the dining room, Peach in a spare dress she had brought and Naruto a simple set of black shorts and an orange shirt. Once they entered, Peach was greeted by an ecstatic Junior, but Naruto saw the surprised looks from Bowser, Birdo, Kammy and Kamek.

Naruto cocked his head, "What's wrong?"

-0-0-0-0-

The next morning, a certain plumber woke in a strange bed, in a strange room, with an ungodly hangover and a strange pain in his ass.

_Oh, what happened?_ He thought, _Last thing I remember was those hammer brothers, and… maybe chain chomps?_ His thoughts were interrupted by something poking his side. Mario turned and paled at what he saw.

Vivian, the youngest of the shadow sirens, was looking back at him, "Good morning, lover," He purred.

Mario's scream could be heard for miles around.

-0-0-0-0-

Mario walked Peach out of the Koopa castle, limping noticeably, even if he didn't notice hers.

"Are you alright, Mario? Are you hurt?"

"No, no!" Mario said, quickly, "I just… got a little lost on the way here, I'm a bit tired. Let's just get you back to the castle and we can both rest easy." _And I can take a shower, a long, six hour, boiling hot shower._

"Right, Mario." Peach said as she stole a quick glance back into the castle, blowing a kiss to a figure standing on the ceiling when Mario wasn't looking.

Naruto watched as the princess and her 'savior' left, and mentally began plotting his next triple 'kidnapping', among other plans.

**-0-0-0-0-**

**And there it is, and no I'm not going to be bashing the brothers that much, I just felt like poking fun at Mario a bit, and Luigi will probably be alright when he shows up.**

**Now I need a little help with something. From Naruto's world, I have a plan for three wives alongside the three in the Mushroom Kingdom. I already know the first two will be Hinata (Because I want to, so suck it) and Ino (For a story related reason) but I would like suggestions for a third.**

**However, the third wife must either be affiliated with Konoha or no other ninja village, and it can't be Sakura (She's gonna take a few kicks in the ass in this story) or Tsunade (for a number of reasons, but above others that it wouldn't quite mesh with the story at the moment).**

**If nothing else, I might have an idea for an old bit part character I might use, but I'm open to any suggestions within the above guidelines.**

**If anyone cares, put it in a review, if you don't care then you probably won't read past this chapter anyways.**

**Laters.**

**_June 9, 2012-Sorry for those expecting an update, but I figured I don't want my ass booted off for one out of ten stories, so I cleaned this up a bit and I think it's at acceptable levels of filth (No explicit descriptive content). If any are interested in an uncut version, just look for the story under the same name on AFF._  
**

**_And if you have a problem with the crackdown, you can help out. Write into the site staff, or sign a petition (Psudocode Samurai has a good sized one, and you can find one here [ www . change petitions/fanfiction-net-stop-the-destruction-of-fanfiction-net ] if you remove the brackets and the spaces). _**

**_Personally, I think this could all be fixed with an MA rating tied to a sign in age entry when you log in, meaning you'd need a log-in name to see the big-people stuff. And I know "What if they lie about their age?"...well, if they lie about it here, then they'll probably do the same on some much worse sites than this, so it wouldn't matter.  
_**

**_And yes, I know there used to be a rating like that, but that was years before I even knew of this site.  
_**


	2. It'sa Me, Naruto!

**Chapter 1- It's-a me, Naruto!**

A small caravan was heading west through Hi no Kuni, intent on reaching Ame no Kuni, their identities hidden by the heavy hoods which protected them from the rain. Some seemed young, some old, some men and some women, with a hooded man at the front walking with a confident posture. The group was quiet, but quick, trying to get out of the country as fast as possible, when a group of ninja appeared in front of them, most wore emotionless expressions, but the one in the lead seemed arrogantly confident, and his companion seemed confused and angry.

"Did you think you could get away, idiot?" Sasuke sneered.

"Naruto what are you doing?" Sakura screeched, "You could be made a missing nin for this, Sasuke could EXECUTE you for this, you moron!"

Then the blonde did something she hadn't expected.

He laughed.

"The teme can't do shit, it's the hokage who decides the fate of Nuke-nin."

Sakura's eyes narrowed and watered, "If you had stayed a bit longer, you…you'd know Tsunade-shishou died in her sleep." Sasuke put on a smug sneer as the pinkette continued, not noticing, "Her notes said she was planning on making Sasuke her successor."

Once again the blonde surprised the both of them when he burst out laughing, then looking to the Uchiha, "So that's your plan, eh Teme?" he looked back to the medic, "There are three things wrong with that statement, first Jiraiya would come back to live as Orochimaru's butt buddy before Tsunade made that bastard Hokage, second, no other shinobi village would accept the idea of him in the lead without declaring war, and…lastly," he looked to one of the hooded figures, which revealed a very amused, very much alive Tsunade, "That wasn't Tsunade's corpse, it was a temporary corpse double, and a poorly made one at that," he leered back at Sakura and Sasuke, "Seriously, it didn't even have the right plumbing, so much for the best rising medic-nin in Konoha." He saw a confused look on her face, "Let me guess, you just saw her face, ya know sometimes 'Look underneath the underneath' can be literal, bitch." He sneered.

Sasuke sneered as he subtly signaled the ROOT nin with him, who drew their weapons.

Sakura looked around, "Wha-what's going on?"

Naruto chuckled, "It seems your precious Sasuke is showing his true colors."

Sasuke smirked, "I don't know how you found out, but it is too late, the plans are in motion, you;ve actually made this easier. The people will be so devastated when they learn the 'demon' was lying all along and killed their great Tsunade."

"Well," The young Namikaze said, taking a thinking pose, "as to how I found out, your little assassin jumped the gun. But I was surprised, how the hell did you get Shino to turn against me?"

"He wanted that Hyuga bitch of yours once you were dead," Sasuke said confidently, Sakura's eyes widening at his open admission of guilt.

Naruto's expression hardened as he glanced at Sakura, "Given your choice of women, you don't really have any right to call Hina-chan a bitch, and don't give me that look, Haruno," He barked, getting a flinch from Sakura.

"B-b-but-" Sakura stammered before she was cut off.

"So, I guess Aburame is dead?" Sasuke cut in, getting a nod from the blonde, "Well you saved me the time then, now I can just wipe you and your so called 'Precious People' out and take what should have been my clan's in the beginning." Once again, everyone was surprised when the blonde began laughing again.

When he calmed down a bit, Naruto looked at Sasuke, wiping a tear from his eye, "Oh, that's a good one. Your big bad plan has three big flaws, though teme, and I mean huge, bigger than your fucking ego." He ignored the glare as he continued, "First, you think you've caught me," with that and a hand sign, most of the people in the caravan became copies of him in a puff of smoke, the only ones who remained the same were those who would be strong enough to make their own, Tsunade among them, "If I wanted us to stay hidden, your little ROOT zombie leftovers would never have found us." His eyes seemed to space out for a second before he continued, "And now anyone who is precious to me, including Tsunade, is safely in the protection of Mizukage Mei Terumi, and I said not to give me that damn hurt puppy look, Haruno," he barked at Sakura, getting another flinch, "You don't have a right to act like the injured party after what you did to me."

Sakura shook a little under Naruto's glare, "B-b-but Naruto, i-it's-"

"B-but Naruto, it's Sasuke-kun," Naruto finished in a high, mocking tone before his expression hardened, "twelve hours, this bastard wasn't even back in the village for twelve hours, hell the fucking sun hadn't even set before you called off our engagement to run to him. And a note, A FUCKING NOTE, AND YOUR RING ON THE COUNTER? THAT'S HOW YOU END A TWO YEAR ENGAGEMENT YOU BITCH!? AND A NOTE I DIDN'T EVEN SEE UNTILL I'D ALREADY SEEN YOU TWO SUCKING FACE IN THE STREET!"

Sakura shrank into herself, but Sasuke, who seemed to have forgotten all about why he was here for the moment, sneered smugly, "Feeling jealous idiot?"

Naruto snorted, waving him off, "If you want her, you can have the banshee. I have three great mates anyway, and besides, Hinata-chan's nicer, Ino-chan is tougher and Yakumo-chan is smarter. We've gotten off track anyway. As I was saying your second mistake, oh high lord of emo queens, is that absolutely nobody outside of the village will believe I would kill Tsunade, and the only people left in the village who would believe it hate me already anyways, but since she's alive and well, it's a moot point," he shrugged.

"And third?" Sasuke asked, getting a bit irritated with Naruto's games.

Naruto smiled and raised a hand to shoulder level, "Well, the third thing is," with a snap of his fingers, most of the ROOT ninja fell to the ground, dead with kunai in the back of their skulls, "You thought these bastards were enough to help you beat me." With a flick of his wrist a kunai, an oddly shaped kunai, flew out of his sleeve and into his hand, which he threw toward the arrogant bastard.

Sakura saw one of Sasuke's eyes change as the blade flew towards him, the full weight of the Uchiha's actions hit her as she ran between her old teammates, trying to stop save the blonde, not noticing that he too activated his own jutsu.

-0-0-0-0-

Time/space ninjutsu are rare, as many high level ninja would tell you.

That is to say jutsu, outside of your average summoning and item sealing, that actually affect the fabric of time and space are VERY RARE, for two reasons. First, many are very chakra intensive, some requiring more energy than a ninja could produce in their entire career, if their entire life. The second reason is that the ones that aren't as draining are extremely hard to master, requiring years of practice and experience to even begin to learn, let alone master, and some require one to work a bloodline ability to be trained on a specific tangent to an extreme degree.

So they are very rare.

And because they're rare, information on their interactions are ever rarer. It's easy to learn about the interactions of normal jutsu, common sense will tell that a **Katon: Gōkakyū no Jutsu **will be put out by a sufficiently powered **Suiton: Mizurappa. **And previous experience will tell ninja that while trying to counter a fire jutsu with a wind technique will probably get you killed, using them in tandem with an ally can boost their power.

But given the fact that only two people have proven able to use the **Hiraishin no Jutsu**, and few of the Uchiha clan have been able to reach the point that they could even begin to learn the **Kamui **technique, their interaction with each other would have only been open to wild speculation.

Untill that day.

-0-0-0-0-

As Sasuke's **Kamui** activated, the blond used his **Hiraishin**, activating the jutsu-shiki on his kunai. As the two Jutsu collided, something unexpected happened. A clear bubble formed, exploding outward from the kunai, swallowing the blond as he reappeared and the approaching Sakura as well. The bubble hung there, its captives seemingly frozen in time.

Sasuke smirked as he saw his target, seemingly wrapped up and waiting to die, not even really noticing the odd pain in his left eye. He saw his former teammates eyes move as they hung in the air.

"Well, idiot, I didn't think you could make this any easier," the Uchiha said as he ran through a few hand signs, electricity forming in his hand, not really thinking as he charged forward, "But her you did."

Now as said before, the interactions of time-space ninjutsu are largely unknown, and triple jutsu interactions are just as unknown. Just the arching lightning of the traitors attack began to affect the bubble, as the hand pierced it the time/space irregularity began to de-stablize, and once he got almost to the shoulder, the whole thing collapsed in an explosive rush of wind, causing Naruto and Sakura to disappear, along with Sasuke's left arm, leaving the Uchiha on the ground with a bleeding stump.

Sasuke looked up at the small crater left behind. He didn't know how, but he knew, just knew Naruto was still alive, which shot many of his plans to hell. The pink haired harpy was gone, which was a loss. He hadn't really cared for the loudmouth bitch, but as a respected ninja and a fellow apprentice of a Sannin, her presence would have lent him credibility, and he knew she was blind enough to give him an alibi anytime he needed it. But that was shot, and with the blond hag alive and kicking, it would be long until the true story got around, so he'd need to act fast and mobilize the rest of ROOT, maybe enact Marshal Law and hope it worked. The Uchiha groaned as one of the remaining ROOT with him stopped the bleeding from his new stump, and questioned if things could get worse.

A question the universe succinctly answered when the pain in his left eye reached its apex, and the eye popped in its socket like an overfilled balloon.

-0-0-0-0-

Hanabi Hyuga stepped into her study, sighing at the sight of the paperwork on her desk. Sometimes, she wondered why she wanted to be clan head at all, and silently cursed her older sister for finding a way to get out of it without a new tattoo on her forehead. She loved the woman and her new family, but it was Hanabi who ended up with all the politics bullshit and paperwork while Hinata got the good looking husband and co-wives, or 'mates' as they insisted on referring to each other. Hanabi sat at her desk, but wouldn't be there long. The first thing she found on top of the pile seemed to be a normal hospital file, but the problem was that the name wasn't that of anyone she knew. She sped down to the diagnosis part where there was a mark she recognized, a small one, small enough that anyone not looking for it would have missed it next to a sentence.

_Unfortunately, due to the corrupted cells, the sclera needs to be removed._

Sclera, the white part of the eye, the white eye needs removed.

Hanabi sighed. She had spoken about this with her sister and in-laws about this sort of thing since the Uchiha's return. After Sakura's betrayal, Naruto had gotten paranoid about why Sasuke was back, or at least Hanabi had hoped it was just paranoia, but it seemed to be true, and now she had a choice. The fact she had gotten this meant the Uzumaki family had already left, and with the rumors of Tsunade's death, which Hanabi highly doubted, she'd either have to get as many of the clan as she could to leave along with her, or stick around with whoever became the next Hokage. Unfortunately, with Naruto gone, many of the 'powers that be' will probably force the Uchiha as hokage, which would be all around bad.

Hanabi stood and left her office and paperwork behind, she had packing to do.

-0-0-0-0-

Elsewhere in the village, a few other people in the village were receiving similar messages, most notable was the Inuzuka matriarch, who wasn't surprised that her…'beneficial friends' had predicted the treachery right, she had never trusted the Uchiha brat.

-0-0-0-0-

Meanwhile, a group of Konoha refugees were loading onto a boat bound for Kirigakure no Sato under the personal protection of Mizukage Mei Terumi. Shortly after the boats set out, the red-haired Kage speaking with her blond counterpart, three of the passengers dropped to their knees, sobbing and gripping the junction of their necks and shoulder.

"What happened?" Tsunade called out as she ran to the three Uzumaki women.

"H-he's gone," Yakumo Uzumaki sobbed, "S-something-something," she broke down, unable to continue.

"N-Naruto-kun," Ino Uzumaki wept, "something happened to him, we can't sense him." She said, causing all in attendance to pale.

The wives had been able to sense their mate since their wedding day, or more accurately their wedding night. They couldn't read his thoughts or broadcast their own to him; they could only get a feel of his emotions when he was close, but they could always find him and feel his presence, his bright and warm heart and soul, and to be suddenly cut off from him made the world seem so much darker.

Tsunade, tears in her eyes, raised her hand to her neck where her pendant once hung, "Is-is he-"

"No," Hinata interrupted, getting her wives attention, "He's alive. He's just…away, far, far away." The other girl's expressions brightened at the news from of their mate as she looked to Ino, who nodded.

Hinata had always had a better, deeper connection to Naruto. Ino and Yakumo got a little jealous at times, but had come to accept it, she had loved him longer so it only seemed to make since her connection to him would be better.

Ino stood shakily, drying stains on her cheeks, "Mizukage-sama, we'll need a room when we reach land."

-0-0-0-0-

Naruto stood, shaking his head and fighting off a pounding headache, "Ugh, what the hell was that?" He then noticed the voices, odd voices in a language he couldn't understand, he looked and his eyes widened.

Turtles, shitloads of turtles, big, bipedal, talking turtles, some with different colored shells and some with robes, but all of them were staring at him.

Naruto sighed, "Oh, fuck me," he groaned, before hearing a snort behind him and he turned around.

He wasn't sure whether this was a turtle or a dragon, but the thing was big, about a foot taller than him with red hair, gold scales, a spiked green shell and painful looking claws. It glared down at the blonde and snorted like a bull, small twin streams of fire shooting out.

"Oh fuck me _sideways,_" Naruto cursed as he dodged a claw swipe from the beast, only to be caught by its tail, knocking him into a wall with a couple of gashes in his side, which already began healing and finished in a few seconds. Naruto stood back up, more pissed than anything, "Alright bastard, you want to rumble, then bring it on." He called as he tossed off the rain cloak.

The smaller turtles looked slightly awed at how quickly he wounds from their leader healed, but the big guy himself was angry. He hadn't really understood what Naruto had said, but could tell from body language that he was being challenged, and for once seemed to be formally challenged. He barked orders at the smaller ones, who began backing away. The turtle leader turned back to the blonde and roared, spewing fireballs at him.

Naruto growls and quickly counters each fireball with a **Suiton: Teppōdama**, which surprised the large beast just long enough for the ninja to chuck a few kunai at him, which clanged harmlessly off the front of his shell.

"Shit," Naruto cursed as the turtle charged him, while his speed was surprising for his size it was nowhere near fast enough to catch the blonde, who caught his opponent with a hard kick to the head as he leapt over the turtle. Just as he landed though, he heard a roar and turned just to be hit by a large spinning spiked shell, which shot him into a wall, hard, leaving a ninja shaped indentation in the stone wall. The shell stopped spinning as its occupant popped back out, chuckling deeply, until he felt something like a blade poised at his neck, like a pressure on his chest, and he could see his followers felt it to as many withdrew into their own shells. He watched the human pull himself out of the wall, seemingly unhurt, as he glared at the turtle with blood red eyes.

"Okay, now I'm pissed," Naruto said in a low tone as his chakra cloak formed.

The turtles watched as the odd red energy formed around the young man before it seemed to be drawn back into his skin, the following red flash blinded those in attendance for a few seconds, and when the spots were blinked away, the human had changed greatly, he now had nine burnt orange tails billowing behind him, his hair the same color, and his ears lengthened to a point.

The turtle boss shook his head, not letting this change daunt him, and charged forth again, letting fly a few more fireballs. Naruto swatted the fireballs away with his bare hands and, once he was at arm's length, grabbed the beasts head and slammed it into the ground. It tried to swipe with its claws, which were easily caught in his tails. It managed to wriggle free and withdraw into his shell and launched his spin attack, but was quickly and violently stopped when Naruto, with a flick of a tail, slammed him into a wall, leaving a larger crater than Naruto had left earlier. Naruto didn't leave a chance to recover and charged forward, landing multiple consecutive hits and continued laying into the turtle until it called out. Naruto leapt back, not knowing what to expect next.

-0-0-0-0-

Sakura came to with a splitting headache, even worse than the first time Tsunade had taken her out drinking. She tensed a bit when she felt a cool, wet cloth dabbing her forehead, but softened a bit when an elderly sounding voice was talking to her, or at least she thought it was to her, but Sakura couldn't understand the language. She opened her eyes to see an old woman tending to her, and extremely short woman, who smiled and said something before leaving the room.

Sakura groaned and tried to think, how did she get there? Who is that woman? What was with the weird mushroom hat? What happened to her teammates? At that last one she groaned again. Her choices always seemed to bite her in the ass. She honestly thought Sasuke had changed his ways, only to find he was worse than ever. And now Naruto hated her, which surprised her. She had no delusions that he wouldn't be hurt by her leaving, and she was sorry for that, but she had felt the need to follow her heart, and, despite the complaints from the voice in her head, she had waited so long for a chance with Sasuke, but for the blonde to actually hate her? She had thought he would always love her, at least on some level, but he had known the Uchiha was up to something, and had left her high and dry. Had she really gone that far as to push her staunchest supporter into hating her?

-0-0-0-0-

Naruto watched as the big turtle pried himself from the wall where his spikes had stuck in. The creature was obviously to beat up to continue, and glared at Naruto. For a moment, the ninja thought he would push the fight until one of them died, but the two of them locked eyes for a moment and the turtle said something before kneeling. This confused Naruto a little, a feeling which was multiplied when he heard shuffling and turned to find every other turtle in attendance was doing the same.

Naruto said the only thing that came to mind, not that anyone there understood him, "What the hell have I gotten myself into?"

-0-0-0-0-

Elsewhere, in a darkened field a few miles away from Naruto, a severed human arm appeared, but was promptly eaten by a rather large plant bulb.

**-0-0-0-0-**

**And there's the first actual chapter. Yes I chose Yakumo as the third, Anko had a few more votes, and Maybe I can be convinced to bring her in much later, but I chose Yakumo for a reason, she completes the trio.**

**Hinata = Taijutsu**

**Ino = Ninjutsu (her family jutsu and medical abilities are all classified as Ninjutsu)**

**So Yakumo finishes it out with Genjutsu. Not really sure what else to say except that it's almost time for summer vacation, so hopefully I'll be able to work a bit more on my stories. Next chapter of this we'll be meeting Peach and learning a bit about the Koopa Klan.**

**And sorry for anyone who Likes Shino. Personally, I think he's kinda cool, but so many people portray him as a cool, calculating and logical person, like a Vulcan or something, and so many people have Kiba being the one to betray Naruto to get to Hinata, I, however, wanted to try and swing it like this.**

**Laters.**


End file.
